I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
