we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize