We won't sleep together?
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Randomize
