I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize