Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Randomize
