can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I am naked and annoyed.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
