Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
