You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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