conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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