I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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