Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
