omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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