on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize