Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
