I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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