sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
