If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Randomize
