does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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