worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
