HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Randomize
