Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
