I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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