You work out of a Hotel?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
i drank out of a bidet.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
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