Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
