Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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