I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
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