New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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