I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize