come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Randomize
