he wants to bone in the snuggie
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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