Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
she smelled like a LAN party
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Found the puke drawer
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Randomize
