just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
