About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
