Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
And then the night went full on bisexual.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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