my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
