you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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