where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Boobs are out for the taking
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
