He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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