Yo dont text me then not text me
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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