Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize