No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
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