a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
