Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Randomize
