i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
