At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
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