Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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