Is it normal to miss your booty call?
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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