Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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