honey bunches of taint.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
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