The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
how does that bad decision feel?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize