don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize