Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
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